Power, Personality, and Purpose: The Pillars of Potential

Personal development is a lifelong journey toward realizing your full potential. It is a field that integrates insights from psychology, health and fitness, and philosophy/spirituality, applying their principles in practical ways. Through my exploration of this field, I discovered a recurring pattern that led to the development of a structured framework for personal growth—built upon three key pillars: Power, Personality, and Purpose.

Each pillar aligns with a different aspect of time—Power with the past, Personality with the present, and Purpose with the future—offering specific practices to maximize growth. While the personal development industry offers countless techniques and strategies, they all ultimately strive toward the same goal, which we will explore in depth. However, no single pillar can support the weight of transformation alone; they must work together in harmony, or the pursuit of potential will collapse under its own weight.

Power (Past)

Power drives us toward our purpose, yet it is deeply tied to the past—the very source of what often holds us back. When we carry negative perspectives on past events, our power drains, giving rise to self-doubt, limiting beliefs, and overwhelming emotions that keep us confined within our comfort zones.

The past events themselves don't take our power; rather, it is the meaning we assign to it. Events are neutral until we impose our subjective interpretations. Negative experiences linger when we fail to learn from them, allowing them to haunt and trigger us. By extracting lessons—no matter how painful—we free ourselves from their hold. This shift in perspective transforms our behavior and reclaims the power we once lost. If we control the past, we can control the future.

I focus on two primary ways to reclaim power in these situations. The first involves physical exposure and repetition, gradually reducing the intensity of our emotional response. The second engages the unconscious mind through deep reflection or trance-like suggestion. While deep reflection and suggestion can often create faster shifts, both methods are effective pathways to transformation. At their core, these techniques rely on knowledge and learning—understanding our triggers, reinterpreting past experiences, and integrating new insights.

Ultimately, the answers we seek may already exist within us—it is simply a matter of accepting the truth or intentionally searching for it.

Overcoming Past Experiences (Perspectival knowing):

This self-coaching technique involves reflecting on past negative experiences by writing about them. This uses perspectival knowing to gain insight and understanding into your emotions, thoughts, and actions to improve future outcomes. To achieve this, you need to be honest with yourself and consider the event from different perspectives. This approach can help you learn from past experiences which is the key to overcoming these past experiences and make positive changes.

1st person perspective: This perspective focuses on your subjective viewpoint, centred around your thoughts, feelings, and experiences.

Reflect on your emotions and how you felt during the event.
1. Consider what made the experience negative, whether it was internal or external factors
2. Consider what you did, what emotions were present, how you engaged, and your role in the event.
3. Think about whether you would change how the experience went and why.
4. Reflect on how the experience affected the rest of your day, week, month, etc…
5. Consider whether similar experiences happen often, and what caused this experience to occur.
Reflect on your response to experiences that were out of your control and consider how you could have responded differently.
For experiences that you had control over, identify the skills or actions that could have led to a desired outcome.

As you move through the following perspectives, identify what you may have missed and what insights you can apply in the future.

2nd person perspective: Shift your perspective to view the situation from the standpoint of someone involved in the event. Consider their emotions, motivations, and experiences to gain a broader understanding.

3rd person perspective: Detach yourself emotionally and assess the event, this allows for a more logical viewpoint though not entirely unbiased.

4th person perspective: Consider the event from a broader viewpoint, such as how a group or society might perceive or be affected by the situation.

Divine Perspective: This perspective offers a comprehensive viewpoint that transcends individual, collective, and temporal limitations. It encompasses the interconnectedness of all perspectives. It offers a profound, overarching understanding of the experience within the grander scheme of existence.

Return to the first-person perspective and notice if strong emotions are still present.

If so, continue to identify what you are unwilling to learn.

If not, take the lessons learned and integrate them into your future experiences.

Knowledge is Power

If you find the above technique challenging, the education provided in previous posts can help bridge the gap—offering insights that you can pass to your past self. Whether gained from the past or present, knowledge and learning serve as catalysts for healing and growth. The tips below will support this process and your continued development.

Tips for improved propositional (scientific information) knowing:

Pre-Learning

Have a passion for what you are wanting to learn
Understand the purpose of what you are learning (for what reason?)
Prioritize your learning if you have multiple things you want to learn
Have objective questions or ideas of what you are looking for and are trying to learn (don’t just have questions that suit our bias)
Get into a peripheral learning state (unconscious/parasympathetic state)
Learn in the environment you will be applying the information in

During learning through reading

Utilize your peripheral vision and saccades
Pre-read texts, look for key components and search for the questions you want to be answered. (If it's a video or audio, speed it up or see if it has markers of discussion points, or if they have it transcribed)
Utilise your imagination to anchor key points and ideas either with previous ideas or use new symbols and images to improve comprehension.
Pause and review the learning, with longer pauses after bigger chunks.

Post learning

Write a summary of what you learnt without going back through it.
Teach different people what you have learnt and apply it in different ways using different representational systems to retain most of the information in your long-term memory.

Best tips to optimise learning?

Optimise health (mitigate stress)

Personality (Present)

Centred in the present, the now. It’s about having the self-awareness to reflect deeply and understand ourselves—who we currently are, what we are (human), and how we function. This understanding includes recognizing our current capabilities (skills and knowledge) and character (emotions and behaviors), as well as embracing all the strengths and weaknesses we possess and the things we value.

Self-awareness serves as the foundation for meaningful transformation and consistent progress. Some tools to assist this reflection and analysis:

The main reflections I usually recommend are a personality test, stress assessment, analysis of time and money spent (values), and a less formal reflection on virtues. Various tests can provide additional insights into who you are, such as IQ and cognitive function assessments, or more formal assessments on things like virtues.

Tools for self-reflection:

Personality test: understandmyself.com

Utilizing the six domains of life and health is a powerful way to reflect on stress, including hidden stressors you may not be aware of. This awareness helps identify the best area to focus on first.

Stress

Many people mistakenly believe their physical body is the sole determinant of health, but it is better to look at health as the mitigation of stress. The accumulation of stress generally leads to chronic inflammation which increases the chances of disease. A further problem is that most people are unaware of—or fail to address—the silent causes of stress that comes from tension and only focus on pressure. This connects with the psychological concepts of shame and guilt. Shame connecting with pressure and guilt with tension.

Pressure: This represents the external influences that contribute to stress. These influences can be social, such as societal expectations, or natural, such as environmental or situational factors. Pressure comes from forces outside of the individual, pushing them to meet certain demands or navigate challenges.

Tension: Tension refers to the internal standards and expectations that an individual places on themselves. These standards are often shaped or influenced by social pressures, but they can evolve as the individual breaks free from these external influences. Tension arises when there's a misalignment between one's internal expectations and external demands, often leading to stress.

Balance

Balance is not about moderation but equilibrium. Achieving this requires minimizing stress over time through mitigation (consistent effort and sacrifice). True equilibrium involves maintaining the appropriate state—sympathetic or parasympathetic—at the right time. By identifying the sources of stress, whether internal (tension) or external (pressure), you can better understand where to focus your time and energy. However, this process is only effective if you are honest and true with yourself.

Area of life	Pressure Score/10	Tension Score/10
Material
Intellectual
Physical
Spiritual
Social
Environment

Stress in different areas often stems from underdeveloped domains, as illustrated in the diagram below. The time you spend in each domain reflects its development. Downtime, often equivalent to wasted time, reduces the effort spent on areas that could actively reduce stress rather than merely avoiding it.

The Daily Cycle

Our lives follow a consistent cycle: we wake up, our attention is activated, and it shapes the choices we make. These choices, in turn, influence the quality of our sleep and the level of fatigue we carry into the next day. This cycle either optimizes or distorts our focus, which impacts the decisions we make. We can either enter positive loops that boost productivity or negative loops that waste our time and energy.

Values

Time can be seen as a form of spiritual currency, making it valuable to reflect on where we invest both our time and money across the domains below. Together, they reveal what we truly value.

In the table fill in the number of hours you spend in each domain in a standard day verses a day off. To make it easier, 1 month is 4 weeks and 1 year 13 months

DOMAIN	Day	Day off	Week	Week off	Month	Month off	Year	Year off
Physical
Intellectual
Material
Spiritual
Social
Environmental
Downtime
Sleep

This can be further broken down into specific categories. Below are examples, but your life may reflect them differently, and you can add more than three if needed.

Physical	Time spent	Money Spent
Nutrition
Movement
Recovery

Intellectual	Time spent	Money Spent
Learning
Art/creative
New skill

Material	Time spent	Money Spent
Job
Investments
Business/Side venture

Spiritual	Time spent	Money Spent
Contemplating
Meditating
Praying

Social	Time spent	Money Spent
Family
Friends
New relations

Environmental	Time spent	Money Spent
Grounding
Cleansing
Exploring

Downtime/Entertainment	Time spent	Money Spent
Shows/Movies
Gaming
Memes/Scrolling

Sleep	Time spent	Money Spent
Morning routine
Night routine
Sleep time

Below input the TOP 10 places where you spend your time and money

Time Spent	Money Spent

Virtues

Using the 7 deadly sins as a scale to reflect on your own virtues is an informal but practical way to assess your character. This process helps identify areas for growth and highlights where you can improve, ultimately strengthening your moral foundation. Developing virtue in this way is crucial for fostering a moral and good society and striving for this ideal is a key step in both personal development and contributing positively to the world around you.

Humility - The quality of having a modest or low view of one's importance

Kindness – The quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate

Patience – The capacity to accept or tolerate delay, problems, or suffering, without becoming annoyed or anxious.

Appreciation – Recognition, and enjoyment of the virtuous qualities of someone or something

Discipline – Being able to follow your word (the punishment is your suffering)

Responsibility - Ownership of your behaviours

Diligence – Careful and persistent effort

Pride 0 --------------------------------------------------------------------10 Humility

Greed 0 --------------------------------------------------------------------10 Kindness

Wrath 0 --------------------------------------------------------------------10 Patience

Envy 0 --------------------------------------------------------------------10 Appreciation Lust 0 --------------------------------------------------------------------10 Discipline

Gluttony 0 --------------------------------------------------------------------10 Responsibility

Sloth 0 --------------------------------------------------------------------10 Diligence

Currently, I have no tool to assess skills and knowledge, as it could easily become an infinitely long list. However, the post "If knowledge is power, then wisdom is peace" might be a good place to reflect on.

Purpose (Future)

Purpose is our future compass, guiding growth and fulfillment. Without self-awareness or overcoming the past, it is shaped by external forces, leading us astray. Until we overcome those external forces, we will never be able to visualise our true ideal self.

There are 2 Meta habits.

Macro habits – These are the environments we occupy in our routine. E.G., gym, kitchen, library, clubs, people, etc. Expression of values (where we spend our time)
Micro habits – These are the behaviours we act out when interacting within these environments. Expression of Character

The Ideal

Visualize your ideal self, often involving parenthood or supporting others through that journey, The skills and knoweldge you need to obtain and the virtues and values you want to embody. Integrate intentional habits into daily life and reflect on where you want to be and the steps needed to create meaningful impact.

Who do you want to be?

What does your ideal self look like to you?
What do they value?
Are they virtuous?
What habits, skills, and routines does that person have?
Why does that person strive for those things, and for whom? (Ask “Why?” multiple times to uncover the core motivation.)

What Impact Do You Want to Have?

What does that person aim to accomplish?
Where does that person envision themselves in the future?
What will happen if this is achieved?
Conversely, what will happen if it isn't?

Obstacles & Solutions

What challenges or roadblocks might stand in your way?
How can you prepare to overcome these obstacles?

The Cost of Inaction

What will happen if you do not become this ideal person?

By answering these questions with clarity and honesty, you create a roadmap towards your ideal. The more vivid and specific your vision, the stronger your drive to make it a reality.

Do the same as you did above for your ideal self.

Ideal Time Spent	Ideal Money Spent

Measure this up with where you currently are at and realise how much room you have to grow.

Potential (Present)

"We can’t change what we’re unaware of."

Potential is realized through action and growth—what we do now shapes who we become.

Once we reclaim our power from the past and define our purpose for the future, the present is where transformation happens. It is in the now that our ideal self is forged.

"We become who we consistently work on becoming."

By reflecting on our current self and ideal self, we can identify which areas to focus on first, breaking them down into habits and routines that drive progress.

The only thing stopping you, is yourself!

If you find yourself stuck, you either lack

Resources
Support
The Power (something you have yet to overcome)
The Purpose being yours (living someone else’s dream E.G., parents, culture, etc...)

This journey is never-ending, with endless skills to learn that can assist in various scenarios. Some you will master, while others you may become proficient in just enough to be useful. The best way to implement learning new skills is outlined below.

Tips for improved procedural (skills) knowing:

1. Find a skill you want to learn

2. Find someone who performs this skill better than anyone else

3. Model what they do or use formal learning on this topic (create outcome)

4. Reflect on where you are and if that skill is something you want, or someone else wants for you (very important when it comes to motivation)

5. Reverse engineer and create the smallest steps you are willing to take towards achieving this outcome

6. Action, take the first step (if too anxious, the initial step was too big)

7. Reflect on what you tried; did it get you the result you wanted? If not, adjust the steps. If the execution of the process was off, the more you try the better you will get.

8. Keep trying until satisfied and are happy with the process and execution of the outcome

9. If you are satisfied and have learnt that skill, find another skill you want and repeat the steps

The Interconnection of the Pillars

As mentioned, all pillars have to be developed in order to carry the weight of our potential.

Power without self-awareness, action or direction resembles a solitary monk on a mountain—possessing great inner strength but disconnected from meaningful action or aspirations that could extend beyond themselves. Personality without power or purpose keeps us confined to the comfort zone, where growth stagnates. It’s a space of perceived safety but also one of limitation, where self-acceptance becomes an excuse for inaction rather than a foundation for transformation. Without growth, staying still is going backwards. Purpose without power or personality leads to idle daydreaming—a vision of a better life that remains out of reach. Without the power to act and the self-awareness to navigate the journey, aspirations turn into unfulfilled wishes, breeding frustration or resignation.

If the self-coaching techniques feel too challenging, consider seeking a coach for guidance. The core process remains the same: learn, analyze, visualize, and ultimately take action. Potential occurs when we know ourselves, know the direction, and have the power within to get there.

MICHAEL FARAH